January 2001
there are some things
that poetry,
a hot shower,
and a lazy sunday afternoon
can`t even cure.
so,
i
purge myself in days
i poured laughter in the air
in layers so thick…
i felt empty afterwards.
i press my fingers
against the blue sky
and feel my body slowly
readjust itself into the crevice
where my happiness hid.
and only then
would i remember that this existed
forgetting to map
the way back
forgetting the days i`d need the added comfort
of its presence.
in the meantime
my fingertips roam
the valleys between my shoulders,
the hills of my heart,
and the borders between my truths
searching for that void.
waiting to be filled.
knowing no other function.
AND THEN! (another part of another entry….)
augmented truth linnea said on new year’s eve:
“see, hanalei’s an idiot who plays hard to get. then when she realizes that boys do like her, she remembers that she still believes in cooties.”
I really wish i could go back in time and tell the then-me that it was all gonna work out. : )
